When someone at work loses a loved one, it’s not always easy to know what to say. You’re not just coworkers; sometimes you’re lunch buddies, project partners, or part of the same Zoom survival squad. That’s why sending a heartfelt condolence message matters—it shows you care as a human being, not just as a fellow spreadsheet warrior.

TLDR

Keep your message simple, genuine, and kind. Say you’re sorry for their loss and offer support. Avoid trying to “fix” their grief. You don’t need poetic words—just warmth and sincerity.

Why It Matters

Grief doesn’t pause for office hours. When a coworker is going through loss, your thoughtful message can give them a small moment of comfort. It helps build team compassion and keeps your workplace human-centered.

It’s not about being perfect; it’s about being there.

Keep It Simple (And Sincere)

Simplicity wins when it comes to condolence messages. You don’t need big, emotional speeches. A few kind words from the heart go a long way.

• “I’m so sorry for your loss.”
• “Thinking of you during this difficult time.”
• “Wishing you peace and comfort in the days ahead.”

That’s it. You’re not auditioning for a tear-jerking movie monologue. Just be real.

What You Can Say

Need a little inspiration? Here are message templates you can borrow, tweak, and make your own.

If You’re Very Close to Them:

• “I was heartbroken to hear the news. Please let me know if there’s anything at all you need. Sending you so much love.”
• “I can’t imagine what you’re feeling, but I want you to know I’m here for you—today and always.”

If You’re Friendly at Work:

• “I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. Thinking of you and your family.”
• “Sending you strength and comfort. You’re in my thoughts.”

If You Don’t Know Them Well:

• “Please accept my condolences. Wishing you peace during this hard time.”
• “My thoughts are with you. So sorry for your loss.”

Things to Avoid Saying

Even with the best intentions, some words can feel off. Try not to say these:

• “They’re in a better place now.” – That might not feel comforting to everyone.
• “At least they lived a long life.” – It can come off as dismissive of the loss.
• “I know how you feel.” – Truth is, you probably don’t. And that’s okay.

Just stick to kindness and listening.

Email, Card, or Slack Message?

Wondering how to send the message? It depends on the vibe at your workplace and your relationship with the coworker.

Handwritten Card

This one’s a classic. Great if lots of people are signing a group card too. Still magical in a digital world.

Email

Quick, respectful, and personal. Perfect for when you work in different departments or remotely.

Slack or Teams Message

Private and instant. Great if you already chat on those platforms. But keep it professional.

Offer Support (If It Feels Right)

If you’re close to your coworker, you might want to offer extra help. Small gestures can mean a lot.

• “Let me take care of your meeting notes this week.”
• “I brought by a smoothie—you probably haven’t eaten today.”
• “Want help catching up on your tasks when you’re back?”

Don’t over-promise. Do what you can.

Use Humor? Only If It’s Appropriate

Everyone grieves differently. Some people lean on laughter. But tread super carefully here.

If you’re not 100% sure your message will land well, stick to more traditional sympathy. Leave the jokes out.

When to Send Your Message

Timeliness matters. Try to send your message within a few days of hearing the news. It shows you care without hesitation.

Even if you feel awkward, it’s better to say something than nothing.

Follow Up Later

Grief doesn’t go away after a week. It lingers. Checking in a couple of weeks later can mean a lot.

You can say something like:

• “Just wanted to check in and see how you’re doing.”
• “I know things might still be hard. I’m here if you need anything.”

This says: I didn’t forget. And that’s powerful.

If You’re a Manager or HR

If you’re in a leadership role, your support can set the tone for the whole team. Be thoughtful and proactive.

• Give them space to grieve.
• Offer resources, like counseling or flexible time off.
• Rally the team to send a group card or care package.

Help your team be human first, professionals second.

Bonus: Group Message Tips

If your whole team wants to send something together, create a shared card or document. Collect simple messages from everyone.

Example:

• “Our team is keeping you in our thoughts. We’re all here for you.”
• “We’re sorry for your loss. You’re not alone.”

Group messages can wrap grief in community. That’s comforting.

Final Thoughts

You don’t need the perfect words. You just need kind ones. Let your heart lead, and it’ll likely come out just right.

When your coworker is hurting, what really matters isn’t what you say. It’s that you said something.

Send the message. Let them know they’re not alone.